Jokes for a laugh

0
1913
Funny Jokes
Funny Jokes

Array
(
    [top dis] => 
    [bottom dis] => 
)

Tags: Jokes. Humour. Funny Jokes.

LAUGH RIOT

After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, “Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa-bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV. But hey I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl. Now … I have a $750,000 home, a $45,000 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I’m sleeping with a 73-year-old woman.

humour
Humour

So I said to my wife “it seems to me that you’re not holding up your side of things.” My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV. Aren’t older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy’s problems!

A group of chaps, all having reached age 40, discussed where they should meet for a lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at The French Bistro in South Yarra… because the waitresses had big breasts and wore miniskirts. Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at The French Bistro in South Yarra… because the waitresses were attractive, the food and service were good and the beer selection was excellent.

Jokes and Humour
Jokes and Humour

Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at The French Bistro in South Yarra… because there was plenty of parking, they could enjoy peace and quiet with no loud music and it was good value for money.

Ten years later, at age 70, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at The French Bistro in South Yarra… because the restaurant was wheelchair accessible and had a toilet for the disabled. Ten years later, at age 80, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally, it was agreed that they would meet at The French Bistro in South Yarra… because they had never been there before.

For those of my generation who do not, and cannot, comprehend why Facebook exists: I am trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles. Therefore, every day I walk down the street and tell passers-by what I have eaten, how I feel at the moment, what I have done the night before, what I will do later and with whom. I give them pictures of my family, my dog, and of me gardening, taking things apart in the garage, watering the lawn, standing in front of landmarks, driving around town, having lunch, and doing what anybody and everybody does every day.

Laughing is the best medicine
Laughing is the best medicine

I also listen to their conversations, give them the “thumbs up” and tell them I like them. And it works just like Facebook.

I already have four people following me: two police officers, a private investigator, and a psychiatrist.

Other Articles

https://thebribieislander.com.au/funny-jokes/


Previous articleTouring Australia – Woodgate
Next articleLetters to the editor
A highly successful sales and leadership career working in a number of different and very competitive industries. Engaging with decision makers at all levels in business and government. Three decades employed by corporations, SME businesses in senior roles and almost twelve years operating as a freelance contractor has equipped me well for all aspects of business. Whether leading and mentoring sales teams, or in a direct sales role I enjoy the challenge to meet and exceed expectations. Making a real and tangible difference in either a team environment or as an individual is an important personal goal I have consistently achieved throughout my career. In all of my business and personal dealings over the years there is one issue that stands out above all others - communication. Excellent communication skills creates trust, helps with mutually beneficial outcomes and above all cements long lasting positive relationships. I strive everyday to communicate effectively with the people I encounter.